Many articles about how to get the writing done focus on the things like time management, establishing a writing space, and prioritizing tasks. Some writing theorists suggest developing a writing process (Emig; Elbow; Flower & Hayes; Murray). In On Writing, popular novel-writer Stephen King talks about building a "toolbox" of writing skills. Paul Silvia, a psychological expert on writing barriers, poses several strategies for generating copious content in his book How to Write a Lot. Academic and popular writers have all kinds of suggestions on how to get the writing done, but what about how to procrastinate writing? Well, I've come up with several effective procrastination strategies.
First, and possibly the most critical tool for procrastinating, know the due date for the writing submission. Effective procrastination requires the writer to put off the writing task until the last possible moment. Starting writing too early or thinking about the writing task to get a jump on ideas represent epic writing procrastination fails. Writers must also know the minimum amount of time necessary to complete a writing task to ensure peak procrastination effectiveness. Otherwise, writers cannot start the writing at the last possible moment.
Next, writers must plan alternative tasks. While alternative tasks may include writing other than the assigned writing, I must caution that alternative writing may result in accidentally getting some writing done--which counts against procrastination factors. In fact, I'm doing alternative writing right now to avoid writing the literature review for my dissertation. Besides writing about something other than my assigned writing task, I have complied a list of alternative procrastination strategies:
Clean the house or some part of the house--like a closet, an attic, or a junk drawer. A junk drawer would take days! Everyone knows that what lands in a junk drawer are all of the things that cannot be placed elsewhere around the house. Of course, a person could get lost in a closet or an attic for days. These are essential areas to focus on during procrastination cycles. General household cleaning like dusting and laundry also work as effective albeit short term procrastination strategies. Although not always a fun procrastination task, cleaning something gives a false sense of accomplishment when procrastinating writing.
Make cookies or beef jerky or something else delicious. Creating culinary delights is time consuming and will absorb quite a bit of extra time and space (and will ultimately result in initiating procrastination 1 option). Like cleaning, working in the kitchen offers a false sense of accomplishment since yet another task will be completed besides the writing. However, writers will have something to eat later while panicking over the procrastinated writing project. So, #2 is a double bonus procrastination strategy.
Take a relaxing walk. CAUTION: Avoid thinking about the writing task while walking. Thinking about the writing project actually counts as work towards a writing project. Sometimes, my mind wanders into a writing project I am supposed to be working on while walking. Taking space from research to turn an idea over my mind or work something out helps make my writing more productive--especially if I go right back to the task after my walk. To effectively procrastinate, make a strong effort to push away thoughts on the writing at hand and focus on relaxation techniques. I suggest such strategies as squirrel watching, inspecting flowers or weeds mistaken as flowers, and attempting to guess the shapes of clouds (if they are available)...huge time-suckers.
Binge a Netflix series (or any series). A mind-numbing, binge-worthy series is a great way to distract a person from any responsible behavior. A really well-planned binge could even be playing in the background as the writer is writing--causing an even more distracted and perilous writing submission.
Play with a pet. Taking a dog for a walk or getting the cat to chase a string are all worthy procrastination strategies. Training your beast to do a trick or follow a command is seriously time consuming. If your pet is more exotic, like a talking bird, you might spend hours of quality writing time teaching the bird to say a word. Although, pets can also be great snuggle buddies while writing...be careful not to fall into that trap. Remember your purpose: procrastination.
Read a book. I really like a good mystery. Not much can distract me from any reality more effectively than a good Stephen King novel. Now, that guy can write! I get right into his characters, and even when I'm finished reading, I feel like I've moved away from a town I used to live in. I know that if I start Stephen King novel, I'm not doing anything until I finish that last page. Pick a worthy read, but remember, your deadline is looming. If you know you can't get an extension, pick a read you can walk away from or move on to a different strategy.
Take a nap. I like this one for a short term procrastination. This gets me through the short hours before I decide to hit the keys to break the procrastination cycle, but taking a nap can also be effective between procrastination strategies. Because the 20-minute power nap can result in motivational bursts of energy, I suggest a nice long afternoon-wasting nap.
Learn a new hobby. There are so many interesting things I want to learn! How to paint with watercolors, how to throw pottery, how to launch a rocket, how to weave baskets, how to make a Tik-Tok video, how to make paper, how to tin punch, how to create an app, how to fix a carburetor, etc.
Play some computer games. Games like Soduko and Wordle are excellent challengers to stimulate your brain, but let's face it: if you were really looking to stimulate instead of procrastinate, you'd be writing. Naw, naw...let's stay focused on the task at hand: procrastination, baby. Look for the thoughtless computer games, the kind that really numb up the brain and don't require any thought.
Go fishing. A nice, cool body of water on a hot summer's day, poles in. That's the life! Who can think about writing with a bass tugging on the line? Not me! Fishing also provides ample opportunities to extend procrastination by finding local yokels to talk fish tales with. No--I don't mean fish tails...I mean fish tales. The fish never was that big...
Watch Tick-Tok. Last year, I got turned on to Tik-Tok by some students. An hour later, I about lost it. I couldn't believe how much time I'd spent getting sucked into dog videos! How the app got its name is no mystery! Tik-Tok is right! Those videos will soak up time like nothing I've ever tried before.
Finally, request an extension. Engaging these procrastination strategies might even push you past your writing deadline. Even if you know you will make the deadline, you might feel inclined to reach out and ask for an extension with the full knowledge that your instructor, boss, editor, or whomever is setting the writing project deadline, will decline the extension or apply some painful consequence because of your procrastination.
Of course, this is all satire. Procrastinated writing is never as good as planned writing. Writing multiple drafts and communing with other writers help writers to develop and fine tune ideas. Writing involves the development of skill through practice. Author Anne Lamott talks about how writing is not a one-and-done process, although some students may feel frustrated when they can't write a first draft like the highly polished, revised essays read in textbooks. Engaging in multiple drafts helps writers rethink and re-see what they have written. Multiple drafts help to take writing from good to great.
The act of pushing off a writing task--or procrastinating--can actually cause writer's block--that panicky feeling that prevents ideas from forming or transferring from the brain to the page. Although, some theorists argue that writer's block is an procrastination excuse. Silvia calls writer's block a "dispositional fallacy: A description of behavior can't also explain the described behavior. Writer's block is nothing more than the behavior of not writing" (44). And just in case the explanation is not clear, Silva offers an explicit clarification of the flaw in writer's block reasoning: "Saying that you can't write because of writer's block is merely saying that you can't write because you aren't writing" (44). The cure? According to Silvia, overcoming barriers by recognizing what is causing the procrastination in the first place and making a conscientious effort to write--contrary to my satirical list of potential ways to procrastinate.
Some people may not like to write. I concede that writing is not always fun; sometimes, writing is work. Some people may feel like they are not good writers. Maybe not, but practice can lead to writing improvement. Some writers may not feel like they don't have good ideas or didn't have good teachers or don't have anything worth saying or etc. Excuses abound, but none of them get the writing done. Everyone can produce and excuse, and I have a counterargument for each one.
Writing theorists have approached writing practice in a number of ways and (like me) will continue to explore ways student, academic, and professional writers approach writing tasks. Perhaps some scholarship will even focus on the role of procrastination strategies. What's really at stake in procrastination is the actual doing of the task, a conscious decision and action setting aside other tasks in favor of writing. Let's face it, if writers don't get something down, there's nothing to work with. While I've listed at least a baker's dozen of strategies for procrastination, I've also incorporated a few hints about ways thinking about writing can get the creative juices flowing. I've taken a leaf out of a few other writing professional's notebooks and to keep the list short and simple,
If you can't think of something to write, just start writing something. The brain is a muscle; stimulate the brain through exercise.
If an idea pops into your brain while walking, make a voice note on your phone. If you don't take your phone with you on walks, take a notebook. Whatever you use, have something to record your idea. You'll forget it by the time you get home.
If you're already writing, set a break timer and go back to the writing once the timer goes off.
If you're not writing, sit down and do a timed writing.
All of these tongue-in-cheek procrastination strategies are actually effective, but they are not positive or productive. Years of investigation into how and why writers write has yielded copious amounts of data on what works and what doesn't to get the writing done. Perhaps the leading culprit is not actually doing the work. Find a space in a place at a time and start writing. ...not on your blog! On your assignment!
Works Cited
Elbow, Peter. Writing Without Teachers. London: Oxford University Press, 1973.
----. Writing with Power : Techniques for Mastering the Writing Process. New York: Oxford University Press, 1998.
Emig, Janet. The Composing Processes of Twelfth Graders. Urbana: NCTE, 1968.
Flower, Linda, and John R. Hayes. “A Cognitive Process Theory of Writing.” College Composition and Communication, vol. 32, no. 4, 1981, pp. 365–87. JSTOR, https://doi.org/10.2307/356600.
King, Stephen. On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft. New York: Scribner, 2000.
Lamott, Anne. Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life. New York: Pantheon, 1994.
Murray, Donald. "Teach Writing as a Process Not a Product." 1972. Reprinted in Cross-Talk in Comp Theory: A Reader. Ed. Victor Villanueva. 2nd ed. Urbana: NCTE, 2003.
Silvia, Paul J. How to Write a Lot : a Practical Guide to Productive Academic Writing. Washington, DC :American Psychological Association, 2007.
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